Desperation Becomes Known In Loneliness
by LoverByHartEvilByNature
Summary: what if Laurent wasnt there for victoria?what if he came back for bella?what if the pack never attacked and what if he fell in love with her? how do the cullens react?
1. Phone call

Desperation Becomes Known In Loneliness

Desperation Becomes Known In Loneliness

Somewhere in South America: E POV

I sat in an empty cave on some cliff overlooking the ocean.

Sighing, I thought of my Bella. How she would blush crimsom. How the sun lit up her skin. How her hair flew around her face when we drove with the windows down in my-

My thoughts were interrupted by a loud chirping noise coming from my back pocket.

Alice.

She of all people knew better than to call me unless it was an emergency.

I opened my cell phone and pressed the talk button.

"Edward", she said trying to sound happy.

"Alice, what's wrong?" , I asked.

"I had a vision."

"Of ?"

"Bella" , she breathed.

"What happened ?", I asked, already thinking of terrible things flashing through my head.

" I'm not telling you", came Alice's quiet voice.

" What do you mean 'you're not telling me'?"

"I'm not", she paused then added with an edge of steal in her voice, "If you want her to be safe than you come home. I'm not telling you over the phone."

And with that she hung up on him.

I shoved my phone into my back pocket. I had no other options. I had to get home.

Standing, I raced out of the cave and turned north. I was headed for Denali.

Alice's POV:

"Alice, calm down. Your causing me to be figdting now", came Jaspers' melodic voice.

" Sorry, I just wish he would hurry" she apologized.

Sighing, she stepped away from the window and sat opposite of Jasper.

She hadn't told anyone about he vision except Jasper and was very agitated. Edward needed to be here. If he hadn't left Bella this wouldn't be happening. If he hadn't been so stupid we would all be on that house by the river, looking after that clumsy but beautiful girl whom we loved so much. If-

"Alice!" Jasper groaned, "I'm trying to read!"

"Sorry, sorry. I think I'm just going to go on a run." She said quickly, getting up quickly and making my way toward the door.

"Are you sure you have time?" he responded.

She closed her eyes and scanned the near future.

"Yes," she said positive, "he won't be here for another twenty minutes.

Then she stepped outside, took a deep breath of the fresh air, and took off into the surrounding forest. Leaves barely rustling with her passage. Light steps that didn't make a sound.

Running always cleared her mind. The rhythmic movements of her legs causing her to sigh blissfully.

She stopped to lie on a rock untouched by the shadows. She sprawled across it, relishing in the warmth of it.

Her mind begin to drift through time. A happier time, when they all stayed in that rainy little town.

The images flashed through her head in a timeline.

Meeting Bella in the cafeteria.

Bella coming over for the first time to their house.

Them playing baseball.

Bella, as she cried on her shirt in the of the Mercedes. Her face flushed, hair messy.

Then her crippled form in the ballet studio. When they were almost too late.

Next, that fateful night of her birthday.

Lastly, the look on Edwards face. That blank sadness. So much hurt in that look. Never in all her years had she seen so strong a bond than this. Never I all her years had she seen such stupidity from anyone like-

"Alice" said a calm voice from beside a tree.

"Edward" she cried as she flung herself into his open arms. How much had he 'heard?' How long had he been there?

"Long enough" he answered her unspoken question.

"So whats this about a vision?" he asked.

"Not here. When we get home." She cried from half a mile ahead, trying to get a headstart back.


	2. Half of ch 2 Protective Anger

Ch

Ch.2

Edwards POV

"What do you mean she's been hanging out with Laurent?!" I screamed.

"Well", Alice started, "I my vision I saw Bella in the meadow. Then Laurent stepped forward and the talked. That was all I saw. Then I had a second one with Laurent and Bella in the kichten….kissing." She whispered the last word.

"Doing what?!" I yelled. I had been holding back a growl but after that I let it out.

Jasper pulled Alice away and growled back, shifting into an attack stance.

I mirrored it, crouching down and following every move he made.

Soon all the males in the room were crouching in front of their mates and snarls echoed off the walls.

"Enough", came Carlisle's voice, interrupting our staredown. I could hear the tension in his voice as he struggled against the angry and protective waves rolling off of Jasper.

Jasper was the first to get a hold of himself and sent a calming wave throughout the room.

"I'm sorry Alice" I muttered.

"I forgive you" she said, sliding back out from behind Jasper, "and no I didn't see anything else" she finished, answering the question I hadn't asked yet.

**Sorry so short but I am writing the rest of it as we speak. It is currently 11:05 am on the 26****th****. I will post again before the day is over. Thanks for reading. :)**


	3. Chapter 2 Continued Surprise

Ch 2 Continued

Ch 2 Continued

Bella's POV

It had been about a week since the little incident I the kitchen with Laurent. At least that was what I was calling it. Now he hung out with me everyday. We had become good friends. We really got along we even talked about changing me.

I'm not so sure about that. I'm a little hesitant about that for 2 reasons.

He isn't 'vegetarian'.

He isn't Edward.

But I'm not exactly sure friends was an accurate term. What were we?

I pondered that while I folded laundry. It was Saturday and Charlie was fishing with Harry.

Laurent was going to be here soon. He had gone hunting last night and was due back today. I didn't approve of his diets so I was going to talk to him about it as soon as he got back.

Which coincidentaly is right now I thought to my self as I heard the front door open.

Happily I put down the shirt I had been folding and skipped downstairs. Miracously not fallind.

"Hello?" I called out.

"Hello" answered a voice.

That's not Laurent, I thought. I know that voice. That's…..that's….EMMETT!

I came to a halt on the stairs. My heart picked up speed.

"Bella" he called, worry in his voice, most likely caused by the change of my happly skipping heart to frantically skipping heart.

No, no, no, no, I thought as I ran back upstairs and into the bathroom.

Don't let yourself hope. Don't let yourself hope. I repeated like a mantra in my head.

A soft knock on the door made me jump and m insides twist.

"Bella? Bella, let me in. I wont hurt you, I promise. Just let me in. It's me Emmett. Please Belle" he said, trying anyway he knew to comfort me through a door.

Wait! I thought. Emmett's here! I'm in a bathroom and Emmetts here. It's not like he's Victoria.

With that thought I abandoned my hiding spot and launched myself at Emmett.

"Emmett! When I heard your voice I panicked. I didn't think you were really here." I blabbered on.

"Why would you not think I was really here? What else would I be?" He questioned.

"Well I thought you were another voice in my head." I mumbled.

"You hear voices in your head too now?! God, first Edward now you too? When am I gonna get something cool?" He exclaimed.

I flinched involutarily at Edward's name and I couldn't tell if Emmett noticed or not but decided not to ask.

"No", I said explaining, "like a hallucination. Not other people's voices."

Emmett pulled back to look at me but thankfully didn't say anything.

Suddenly I remembered Laurent would be back soon. Emmett wouldn't be too happy about that. I had to get him out of here.

"Emmett, sorry but...uh, you cant be here. I, uh, have to do laundry and clean my room. I still haven't even made Charlie's dinner yet. Verry, verry boring. Geuss you'll just have to leave. Sorry again." I rushed out.

"Bella, I know" , was all he said in his most serious voice.

"Alice?" I asked.

"Alice" he confirmed "And the fact that his stench is everywhere."

"Ok then" I said slumping into the nearest chair.

"Bella we need to talk."

"Uh, ok but not here." I said quickly.

"Why? Will Charlie ground you if you are alone with a guy?" he teased, all previous seiousness was replaced with good humor.

"No," I snapped, "but Laurent will be home soon and I don't want him to know you're here."

"Why is he gonna beat me up?" He said, snickering at the idea.

"No but I don't want him around when we talk." I said, snickering along with him.

We walked out to the porch where I paused to lock the door. When I turned around Rosalies BMW was sitting in my driveway. I turned and raised an eyebrow at Emmett.

"What? It was the only car there and Rose was out shopping" , he explained with an all too innocent look on his face.

"Ummhmm. Fine but I'm driving" , I said putting an edge of authority in my voice. I could do that right? I was the more mature one.

"What's this? Bella Swan, the Chief of Polices daughter going to break the rules of the road?" He said, purposefully deepening his voice.

"I never said I was going to speed. I just said I wanted to drive. Now give me the damn keys and get in the car." I lashed out.

"Yes ma'm", he saluting me before throwing me the keys and sliding in the door.

"Jeez Bella" he muttered "when you said you weren't gonna speed I thought that meant 70 or 80. But not 51! God, what am I gonna do with you?"

"So", I started, speeding up to 75 for good measure, "Where do you want to talk?"

"I don't care. Anywhere you want I guess."

"Anywhere?" I qualified.

"Yeah" he answered.

Where did I want to go? Hmmm, I pondered for a moment, absent mindedly driving.

The next thing I knew I was winding down the path that bought me to the Cullens' household. Well previous household.

When I pulled up I was dumbstruck. There was no pain. I couldn't understand why. Was it Emmett? Maybe. I didn't know.

Amazed I got out and stumbled over to the porch and sat down on the first few steps.

Looking up, I realized Emmett was staring at me.

"Bella? Are you okay?" He asked me, concern deep in his voice.

"Well no…yeah…I guess." I stuttered.

"So what was that?" He asked, skeptically.

"I'll explain later. But first question me."

"Ok well. You don't love Edward anymore." He stated.

I leaped to my feet and was in his face in less than a second.

"Don't you ever say that Emmett!" I practically screamed. "Don't you ever doubt my love for your brother!"

"Then explain Laurent!" He yelled, just as mad.

That was not a question I wanted to answer. I sank to my knees and put my face in my hands.

"I don't know. I was so alone. And he promised to stay. So I don't know, I guess I just jumped at the offer. I don't want to be alone anymore." I said, finallylooking up.

"Oh, Bella" he said, before I was picked up in a bear hug, my legs feet from the ground.

I could feel him moving under me.

Then he sat me down but now I was inside on the couch in the living room.

"Bella?" said a soft voice from across the room.

Looking up I saw a blonde god.

**Is it Carlisle, Jasper, or Rose who do you think. Review and tell me what your guess is. And a special thanx to Unendinglight from lj. Or other wise known as ForeverTwilighted from .**


	4. Memories

Ch 3

Ch 3

Bella's POV

"Jasper!" I yelled, thoughtlessly throwing myself at the vampire.

Jasper chuckled. "Hi there Bella. Nice to see you too."

"Oh", I said, my thoughts catching up with my actions, and stepping back.

"It's okay Bella I fed." He assured me, "You don't have to be scared."

"I'm not", I said stubbornly, "at least not of you."

Jasper looked at me curiously. Then he opened hi mouth to say something but was interrupted by Emmett.

"Not that this love fest isn't great and all but we really need to talk."

"Yes", Jasper agreed, "how about the library?"

"Whatever," Emmett said before he got a sly look in his eyes, "Race yah, Jasper?"

"Sure. Go!" he said.

Then like a bullet shot outta hell they were off.

Half a minute later I could hear them bickering and Emmett accusing Jasper of cheating.

Laughing, I started up the stairs. My hand trailing the silky banister. When suddenly I was sucked into a flashback.

Flashback

_"You're still waiting for the running and screaming aren't you?" I guessed._

_A faint smile touched his lips, and he nodded._

_"I hate to burst your bubble, but you aren't as scary as you think you are. I don't find you scary at all, actually." I lied casually._

_He stopped, raising his eyebrows in blatant disbelief. Then he flashed a wide, wicked smile._

_"You really shouldn't have said that." He chuckled._

_He growled, a low sound in the back of his throat, his lips curled back over his perfect teeth. He body shifted suddenly, half-crouched, tensed like a lion about to pounce._

_I backed away from him glaring. "You wouldn't."_

_I didn't see him leap at me, it was much to fast. I only found myself suddenly airborne, and then we crashed into the sofa, knocking it into the wall. All the while his arms formed a protective cage around me- I was barely jostled. But I was still gasping for air as I tried to right myself._

End Flashback

It was a happy memory but one that brought pain with it.

With a gasp I grabbed myself trying to keep myself together as I stumbled back to try to find something to hold on to.

At that point I had reached the top of the stairs and instead of finding the wall I found the banister.

As soon as I hit it my momentum flung me over the edge.

Wind flying past me, I opened my eyes to see the living room floor coming at me, three stories down.

'So this is how I'll die?' I thought.

At this point I didn't care. I just wanted this pain to stop.

Sighing blissfully, knowing it would all be over soon, I closed my eyes. But instead of the ground I fell into a pair of arms.

'What?' I thought.

Opening my eyes I saw a pale face with dark curls.

Oh, Emmett. I hadn't thought of him.

"Bella?"

His voice sounded far away. I felt tired. And I was starting to get tunnel vision.

Then everything went black.

**I'm so sorry that it has been this long till I have posted. I was in San Antonio and forgot my journal that I write in. Please forgive me. This one goes out to all you supporting people.**


	5. Confusion

Ch 4

Ch 4

Jaspers POV

"What's wrong with her?" Emmett asked me.

"Well her fall was hard and fast. And to her your arms are like concrete, so it was like her falling without you catching her. She's just passed out, she'll wake up in a min." I answered.

"Um, okay. But why did she fall? What happened?"

"I don't know. Why don't we wake her up and ask her?" I suggested.

"Yah, but one problem. How do we wake her up?" Emmett asked, thinking.

"I have no idea." I said kind of put out at being helpless.

Then I got a sly, mischievous feeling coming off Emmett.

I looked up to see smiling devilishly at me.

"What" I asked.

"I know how to wake her up. Go get a bucket and fill it with water."

"Oh" I said, understanding now as I ran to find a bucket, laughing the whole way.


	6. Upsetting Confessions

Ch 5

Ch 5

Bella's POV

I lay there, drifting. It was dark and peaceful here.

Is this heaven, I wondered.

No, I decided, if it were Edward would be here.

I tried to remember what had happened. But the last thing I remember was walking up the-

Ugh, now I remember, I fell off the landing.

I knew I needed to get up so I struggled to open my eyes. But they felt heavy. It felt almost impossible. I tried again and succeeded in a crack of blinding light.

Shielding my eyes, I hesitantly peeked them open. Just in time to see Jasper and Emmett throw a bucket of water on me.

I let out a shriek as cold water made contact with my body.

"Why you two little devils. When I find you-" I didn't get to finish my sentence or search for the boys because suddenly things started running in front of me over and over, back and forth, missing me by mere centimeters.

After a few minutes, however, I realized it was Jasper and Emmett.

"Guys, come on" I whined, trying to walk forward only to jump back when one of them flew past me.

How was I supposed to move?

Sighing, I plopped down on the ground, waiting them out.

Seeing I wasn't going to be annoyed by their little game they came to a stop in front of me.

"So are you done" I asked awhile later, after their obnoxious laughter died down.

"Whew" Emmett said, pretending to wipe away tears, "yeah, lets go upstairs."

This time Emmett picked me up and carried me to the library to set me down in one of the lush chairs.

All look of previous fun was wiped clean from both boys' faces.

"So how'd you fall?" they asked.

I contemplated lying to them but decided to go with the truth. Mainly because Jasper would know if I lied.

So I explained the memory, and how the thoughts of him caused me physical pain, which in turn caused me to lose my balance and flip me over the rail.

Jasper, who had sat quietly through the entire thing, much like Emmett, finally spoke, "So now just thinking of Ed- him hurts you?" He asked, switching names when he felt the pain sweep through me at almost hearing his mane.

"Yeah, kind of" I mumbled, twiddling my thumbs.

"That felt like a little more than 'kind of' a minute ago" he replied.

I just stared down at my thumbs.

"So then tell me Bella, what are you doing with Laurent, another vampire?"

Jasper asked, sitting down next to me.

"Well, he showed up about a week ago. I had been looking for the meadow he used to take me to. I thought that if I would go there…oh I don't really know why I went, all I know is Laurent was there." I paused, getting lost in the story.

"And?" Emmett asked, impatiently.

His voice brought me back to reality and once again I started to recite my story.

"Well, he walked right up to me. He said hey and asked 'So, have you seen the Cullen's?' And as soon as he Cu- ya'lls name came out I couldn't take it anymore." I paused again, but this time to hold back tears. Determined to finish, I took a deep breath and steadied myself, "So then he brought me home and calmed me down. Then the next thing I knew I was asleep. And he's been here ever since."

They were both quiet for a long time; so long I was getting nervous until Emmett said "I think you should come home with us. I think you should come back to Denali."


	7. come Back with Me

Ch 5

Ch 5

Bella's POV

I lay there, drifting. It was dark and peaceful here.

Is this heaven, I wondered.

No, I decided, if it were Edward would be here.

I tried to remember what had happened. But the last thing I remember was walking up the-

Ugh, now I remember, I fell off the landing.

I knew I needed to get up so I struggled to open my eyes. But they felt heavy. It felt almost impossible. I tried again and succeeded in a crack of blinding light.

Shielding my eyes, I hesitantly peeked them open. Just in time to see Jasper and Emmett throw a bucket of water on me.

I let out a shriek as cold water made contact with my body.

"Why you two little devils. When I find you-" I didn't get to finish my sentence or search for the boys because suddenly things started running in front of me over and over, back and forth, missing me by mere centimeters.

After a few minutes, however, I realized it was Jasper and Emmett.

"Guys, come on" I whined, trying to walk forward only to jump back when one of them flew past me.

How was I supposed to move?

Sighing, I plopped down on the ground, waiting them out.

Seeing I wasn't going to be annoyed by their little game they came to a stop in front of me.

"So are you done" I asked awhile later, after their obnoxious laughter died down.

"Whew" Emmett said, pretending to wipe away tears, "yeah, lets go upstairs."

This time Emmett picked me up and carried me to the library to set me down in one of the lush chairs.

All look of previous fun was wiped clean from both boys' faces.

"So how'd you fall?" they asked.

I contemplated lying to them but decided to go with the truth. Mainly because Jasper would know if I lied.

So I explained the memory, and how the thoughts of him caused me physical pain, which in turn caused me to lose my balance and flip me over the rail.

Jasper, who had sat quietly through the entire thing, much like Emmett, finally spoke, "So now just thinking of Ed- him hurts you?" He asked, switching names when he felt the pain sweep through me at almost hearing his mane.

"Yeah, kind of" I mumbled, twiddling my thumbs.

"That felt like a little more than 'kind of' a minute ago" he replied.

I just stared down at my thumbs.

"So then tell me Bella, what are you doing with Laurent, another vampire?"

Jasper asked, sitting down next to me.

"Well, he showed up about a week ago. I had been looking for the meadow he used to take me to. I thought that if I would go there…oh I don't really know why I went, all I know is Laurent was there." I paused, getting lost in the story.

"And?" Emmett asked, impatiently.

His voice brought me back to reality and once again I started to recite my story.

"Well, he walked right up to me. He said hey and asked 'So, have you seen the Cullen's?' And as soon as he Cu- ya'lls name came out I couldn't take it anymore." I paused again, but this time to hold back tears. Determined to finish, I took a deep breath and steadied myself, "So then he brought me home and calmed me down. Then the next thing I knew I was asleep. And he's been here ever since."

They were both quiet for a long time; so long I was getting nervous until Emmett said "I think you should come home with us. I think you should come back to Denali."


	8. Danger Magnet

Bella's POV

Ch 6

Bella's POV

Unwanted tears burned in the back of my eyes. They were inviting me to come back with them. Back to Denali. Back to my family.

But they weren't my family anymore. I wasn't a part of them. I was not wanted. I was only an object of their guilt. It was wrong, it should not be like this.

I had obligations at home. Obligations to Charlie.

"Guys, this has gone on long enough. Just because I had a brief relationship to your brother does not mean you should feel like you have to protect me. I mean I really appreciate this but you can't keep putting your lives on hold for me."

I had to pause to regain my motivation, to remember why I was pushing away this opportunity, an opportunity that I my whole mind stretched and reached for. It went against everything in my body to tell them this but I knew I had to.

I was about to finish my painful speech but I was interrupted by Emmett.

"What in the hell are you talking about?" He asked with an absolutely stupefied expression on his face.

That stopped me right in my tracks.

"What am I talking about? I'm talking about the key factor in this. The reason I'm putting myself through this. I'm talking about the fact that your brother doesn't love me. Not now, not then, not ever." I said, almost crumpling under the weight of the force it took to utter those words aloud, to speak the very thing that caused me so much grief.

"He what?!" roared Emmett and Jasper.

"Didn't he tell you guys? He must have. He told me he couldn't pretend to be human anymore."

"Pretend to be human?" mumbled Jasper, "what was going on in that man's mind?"

"Bella?" Emmett called my attention, "None of that matters. We all love you and do not come because we are guilty. We will always protect family, no matter what. We just want you to come home. Please?" he pleaded with big truthful eyes.

"What about Charlie?" I questioned.

"Just leave it to me and Jasper to handle." He said, smiling smugly.

"I don't know. I'm not sure about this. What do you plan on telling Charlie?" I questioned still torn.

"We don't have to tell him anything. We'll leave him a note saying you had to go for some emergency or other and you'll call him when you get there. Simple" He said, smiling, obviously pleased with his conclusion.

While I thought of another reason to stay I heard a slight noise, almost like the buzz of a bee.

Looking to Jasper I realized that it was his phone.

Smiling apologetically, he flipped it open.

"Hi honey." He greeted.

An alarmed expression crossed his face as however was on the phone answered.

A similar look crossed Emmett's.

"What is it?" I questioned, uneasily.

"It's Alice. She says that Laurent came back…. And he found our scent.


	9. Complulsion

Ch 7

Ch 7

Bella's POV

Everything seemed to freeze and speed up at the same time. A flash of movement in the mistd of icy stillness.

"How much time?" Jasper whispered urgently into the phone.

By the look on Jaspers face I could tell there wasn't much.

"Alright. Yeah, love you too. Bye. Bella," he said, looking every bit like the old war luietenant he was, "right a note to Charlie."

Suddenly there was a note and pen in front of me. Hastily, I scribbled a quick letter and folded it, addressing it to Charlie, and handing it to Emmett.

Tucking it in his back pocket, he picked me up and carried me out to the car, hauling me into the back seat, following after.

I felt the vehicle purr to life and jump to a start. Reaching 75 before leaving the driveway.

I recognized the path to my house, and prayed Charlie was having a good day on the water and had lost track of time.

Tires squeling, we skidded to a stop in front of my house, causing me to lurch forward. Emmett jumped from the car, not waiting even until the car had stopped.

He was back before I had time to blink twice.

"Go," he commaned.

I tried not to think of the danger I was in once again. And before I even had time to drive the thought from my mind, I felt a sudden drowsiness. So heavy, so deep, I couldn't fight, ad none of the strength to even attempt to think about fighting it.

And before I drifted away, I forced my eyes up and looked into the rearview mirror, not at all surprised to see Jaspers' locked on mine.


	10. Adonis

Ch 8

Ch 8

Groaning I tried to open my eyes and roll over but something heavy and fuzzy was in my way. Cracking my eyelids open and squinting against the light I looked around and took note of m surroundings.

The room I was in was definitely not mine, wasn't any that was in the Cullen's house either, in fact I had never seen this room in my entire life.

Sitting up and throwing the fuzzy object off, which I could now see was an oversized, overstuffed blanket, I blindly looked around, but before my heart could really get going I spotted a note on the nightstand next to the bed.

I leapt on it like a fila minon (sorry didn't know how to spell that)and I was a dying man in the desert. Opening I read the contents written in flawless handwriting:

Dear Bella,

Calm down before you give yourself a heart attack. You are in Denali. We left towels and toiletries in the door to your left. We left to go hunting. Be back in the morning. SO happy you're here.

Love,

Alice

P.S. there is food downstairs. Love you.

Felling slightly better, I refolded the note and got up to look around and found out that right outside the window I ad a fantastic view of the forest. Tall evergreens for as far as the eye could see. Each proud and brightly contrasted to the light dusting of powder sugar white snow that seemed to cover everything. The sun was just going down, causing all the ice and snow to reflect an orange glow to everything making it all together surreal and breathtaking view.

Sighing, I reluctantly pulled away to go jump in the shower.

Afterwards I ventured downstairs tentatively, feeling like I was intruding. My stomach growled so I made my self a sandwich and sat down at the island in the middle of the kitchen.

Looking around I noticed a rather large picture on the counter. Standing, I went over to look at it. When I picked it up it suddenly looked smaller due to the amount of people squashed in the frame. It was a group picture of the Denali clan and the Cullen's at what looked like a ski resort in the background.

Esme and Carlisle were to the far left in a gentle embrace with Carlisle hugging her from behind. Next, were Emmett and Rosalie who were standing in a similar position yet somehow making it look much more provocative. Beside Alice was perched on top of Jaspers back like the little monkey she was. Next was the Denali clan whose names I could not associate with faces, though I did see a strawberry blonde hanging on Edward whom I assumed to be Tanya. All were laughing maniacally, though Edward seemed to do it while looking a bit agitated in Tanya general direction.

It was right then when I saw just how crowded there picture was; that I realized that there was no room for me. Not that I would be likely wanted. When I noticed how perfect their 'family' was. How perfect everyone matched up. How I so wouldn't.

I didn't belong here. I wasn't wanted here. I was only here because they felt that it was there duty to protect me. And in the process I was once again putting them in danger and disrupting their lives.

Thinking quickly, I jumped up and grabbed a pair of keys off the rack and ran out to the garage. Clicking the alarm the red Mercedes flashed it lights at me. Of course the flashiest one. I groaned inwardly but had no time to spare; no doubt Alice had already seen me and told the others.

I ran over and threw myself in, shoved the keys in and started it. It hardly made a noise and I reversed out the driveway. Once in the clear I threw the car in drive and floored it, toward where I thought would be the general direction of the highway, and didn't go below 90 until then.

Two hours later it was pitch black and I was the only one on the highway. I was still speeding but didn't dare slow down for fear that someone would catch up. I was a little tired but still had a lot of juice from my all day nap due to a certain vampire.

I turned on the radio and flicked around on the stations for a little bit but soon turned it off. Only now, here, a couple hundred miles away, I really thought about my decision. Now what? Did I really do the right thing? Or was I too drastic?

No! I told myself, they didn't need me around to make it all the worse for them. With me around, they would have to hunt extra, make sure I stayed fed and made sure they kept me safe. They were really better off without me.

But were would I go now? Where would be safe?

Florida! I thought with a sudden burst of knowledge. I would go to Florida where it was hot and sunny. Both which didn't mix with a vampire.

Suddenly I could see a distant light in my rearview mirror. I pushed it away without a thought, thinking it was just another rare late night driver.

But something wouldn't go away in my mind and I found myself glancing at it several times as it quickly approached. Unconsciously I steadily applied a little more and more pressure on the pedal going slightly faster and faster. And as it approached I realized it was a sleek little BMW.

At that I put a lot more pressure and pulled forward fast hoping against hope it would suddenly take the approaching exit and leave. But no such dice, it matched me tit for tat and poured on a little more speed to pull up right next to me.

Glancing over I saw Jasper driving and Alice in the passenger seat. Both looking mad, though Jasper looked a little less hostile. There was a third person in the back but I couldn't identify who it was, though they looked male.

Panicking I floored it all the way immediately going up to 170. I had never gone this fast before and it was a little overwhelming, thank goodness nobody else was on the road.

This time instead of staying with me they fell into place behind.

Suddenly I heard a jingle and looked down to see a cell phone in the seat next to me. Sighing I picked it up and read a number I didn't recognize, chancing a swift look in the rearview mirror I saw Alice with a phone.

"Hello?" I spoke into the phone.

"Bella, pull over now!" Alice yelled into the phone.

"Oh darn I don't think you quite ruptured my eardrums there. You might want to try again, but this time put a little more oomph in it." I yelled back before I could think.

"Bella," I heard Jaspers voice on the phone now, having obviously taken it, "alright, really, pull over now."

"No" I said.

"Why not?"

"Because you don't need to do this. It's not your problem. I can handle myself." I thought I heard a soft snort in the background, "please just let me do this. Please just turn around and go home." I begged.

"Oh Bella, you really haven't changed at all have you?" I heard a soft voice say something and then somebody took the phone from Jasper.

I had a really bad feeling all of a sudden and looked in the mirror at the car to try once again to see who it was back there.

I heard a sigh and my gut clenched as a velvety voice said, "Bella"

Quickly I hung up the phone rolled down the window and chunked into the black abyss, heard it clank against the ground and rolled it back up.

Sighing I closed my eyes to remember the one voice I had been dying to hear.

_ Clunk! _My eyes flashed open and quickly swerved back over. I had forgotten how fast I was going and had lost the side mirror. Another second and I would have surely been dead.

Taking a few calming breaths I looked back up to see the BMW coming slowly closer and closer.

But what really caught my attention was that I could only see two heads in the car. Looking again I still didn't see the third.

"Edward" I breathed a second before I felt an icy touch against my check.

Opening my eyes I saw the face of Adonis looking into my eyes.


	11. i cant beleive you

Ch 9

Ch 9

"Pull over" he said softly.

Sighing I debated my choices. My first instince was to jump in his lap and kiss every spot on his perfect face, but was too afraid of the rejection that was sure to come. My second, was to listen to him, because if I didn't he would most likely make me. And lastly, my stubborn streak said don't listen to him.

In the end the combination of my fathers will and mothers spirit won and I tamped the pedal just a bit but enough to accelerate about 10 mph. I looked over at him with a smug look.

"Bella, don't be ridiculous. Just stop the car and we'll talk about this." He said calmy.

"Ridiculous?!" I asked, and saw him cringe at his mistake. Oh yeah, big mistake, I thought. " I'm the one being ridiculous? You are the ones that tracked me down like some sort of prisoner. Its not like you have any control over me. I have my rights. And you know what else get out of my car." I yelled, not caring that I was being rude, I was mad!

"Its not your car" he mumbled.

Annoyed, I ignored that last comment.

"Bella, please I love you stop the car." He pleaded.

My foot slammed down on the brake, we came to a screeching halt in the middle of the freeway. My hands tightened and loosened on the wheel . I made sure my gaze straight ahead. I took deep calming breaths.

"Bella ple-"

"Get out" I said cutting him of.

"What?" he asked with a bewildered look.

" I said get out. Get out_ now_!" I said finally looking at him, my whole body shaking from anger.

I felt a small calming nudge from the car that was sitting idle right behind us, "Cut it out Jasper, I've had enough of you for now. Let me feel what I want to." I said at a even tone.

"I'm serios Edward, get out of the car. Get out and stay out. No actually, get out and stay away. I cant believe you would say something like that. It's one thing not to love me anymore but to add insult to injury you have to lie to me too. I cant believe you have the nerve to stoop to that level. Good luck lving with yourself after that one. I honestly believe that one topped it all." I said rambling on because if I didn't I was sure to burst to tears.

He loved me? I cant believe he jst said that. It's what I had wanted to hear for so long, but not a lie. That kind of proclamaition should never be sullied with a lie.

But then some part of me wondered if he want lying? He had said it so convincingly. But then again he had always been a good liar. No, better to just go with the first thing he told me.

"Bella, Bella, Bella. You should have know that was so not true," he started, and somewhere off to the side I saw the BMW discreetly pull away into the night.

And then he sat down to tell me the whole story. (so sorry guys that I don't want to right all that stuff out. But you should all be able to fill in the blank. And if you can't then shame on you because that means your just jumping ahead and spoilng it for yourself. I'm sure you understand. Once again sorry.)

"Just please. Could you…I don't know…just walk home. You can follow me but let me drive myself back and think about this. Just please?" I pleaded.

"Of course, Bella, I can give you all the time you need. And I'll be right behind you and if ou need anthong you know I'm just a call away." He said quickly.

"Yeah I know. Thanks Edward." I replied as he hopped from the car.

Alright, I thought, as I slowly pulled away, not in any big hurry to get home, as I needed to sort all this out. So he sas he left me for me but if that's true how do I know he wont leave me again after this whole Laurent thing is settled out? What if he thinkd that because I'm in the clear that I would be healthier without him? How do I know when to trust him and when to know?

Oh this would all be easier if I was just a vampire already. Nobody would have to watch me. I would be dtronger and faster, I would be stunning and would belong by Edwards side. But I knew that was about as likely to happen as me getting hit in the head with a flying toilet seat. but then again knowing me it vould happen I guess.

I just still don't know what I'm going to do yet. How about I just sleep on it, I thought as I pulled into the driveway that I had just recently used for an escape route, realizing that lost in my thoughts I had already made it home.

Turning off the engine I got out.

"Bella?" Edwards voice came from behind me. It was very foggy out and a full moon so when he called my name while stepping out of said fog it really made him look like a true vampire.

"Yes?"

"Goodnight, Bella." He said as he steped forward to kiss my forhead and then disappear into the house.


	12. Heated Moments

Ch 10

I trudged into the house and started up the staircase, thankfully nobody tried to stop me though one of the Denali women came up to me with an annoyed expression and stuck her hand out. Sheepishly, I returned the keys to her. And without a word she walked away.

Sighing I made my way upstairs before I was dragged from behind by two slim stone arms

"Bella, dear, I am so happy to see you." cried Esme.

"Hey. I missed you," I said turning around to return the hug.

"Oh, honey I just cant believe how long it's been since I've seen you. Oh we must catch up on things." She said excitedly.

"Oh Esme that sounds great but maybe in the morning." I said.

"Oh, your most certainly right. You just get a good night of sleep and we'll talk in the morning."

"Kay" I muttered, before turning and walking into "my" bedroom. Everything was just as I had left it; bed unmade, lights on, note next to the bed.

Sighing, I shut my door and changed into pajamas. Slipping between the sheets I turned out the night. I layed there just staring straight ahead, looking at nothing. The red walls stared blankly back at me, giving me no hint of the answer I was looking for. I just knew I wasn't going to get a wink of sleep so I murmured Alice's name quietly. Instantly she was at the door with a glass of water and two Tylenol PM in her opposite hand.

"I saw what you were going to ask for." She said walking toward me and shutting the door behind her.

"Thanks Alice, I don't…" I paused about to say 'I don't know what I'd do without her' but I already knew and it wasn't pretty.

"It's alright, just take the medicine." She said softly, saving me from having to say anything.

I quickly swallowed the pills and washed them down before handing the empty glass back to her.

"Goodnight sweetie." She said softly, leaning down and kissing my cheek before turning and walking swiftly through the door.

Yawning quietly, I closed my eyes and drifted away to sleep.

I was standing on the beach looking down watching the wave's crash over my feet. The sun was setting and there was a slight breeze. I took a deep breath to inhale the salty air and closed my eyes, savoring the nature around me. I gave myself up to my senses'. Felt the water washing my feet, slipping and sliding, leaving and returning. I felt the breeze brush up against me, circling and swirling, salty and sweet, caressing my body. Listened to the gulls in the air, calling out to each other in a forever high pitched song.

When I opened them the sun was gone and darkness shrouded the earth around me. I looked over to my left and saw a shadow walking up towards me.

"Bella" I heard a voice breathe my name a moment before sizzling hands touched me check.

"Jacob" I replied looking up into his face which I could only barely make out.

He looked up and over me at something and I followed his gaze to see another shadow drifting towards us.

"Bella" a velvety voice said a moment before an icy touch slid across my face.

"Edward" I said looking up at his face which was a little bit easier to see due to the stark whiteness of it.

"You are in danger. Let us help you." They said together in unison.

But when I looked up in confusion at the two of them they had both vanished into thin air.

In their stead was Laurent who took hold of me and leaned down close to my face. I stood stock still in fear as I listened to what he uttered, "How absolutely delicious you will taste," he whispered to me, his tongue darting out to slide along the shell of my ear. "You can't hide forever I will get you all alone."

Panicked, I jerked around, trying desperately to free myself from his stone grasp.

"NO NO NO! What have you done with them?! Where did they go?! Somebody, please, don't let him kill me!" I screamed, thrashing in all directions.

He pinned me down and started yelling in m face.

"Bella! Bella! Bella!" he repeated over and over again until I opened my eyes and his grasp became softer, and his eyes changed color, and his voice became smoother.

Slowing my actions I looked up into the eyes of Edward and stopped moving as I realized it was just him. He was on his knees straddling my waist with my hands in between his.

"Bella, its okay it was just a bad dream." He said softly.

"Oh" I sighed, relieved to have woken up.

Opening my eyes I suddenly became very aware of the way we were positioned and blushed deeply as I looked up at him. He must have noticed two because I could feel him harden against me.

Letting go off my hands he sat up but didn't move away.

I looked up at his face and could see the desire in it though he was clearly trying to hide it with his stoic mask.

"Oh well...um" he started before I sat upward and kissed him with everything I had. I poured it all into that moment, all my pain, all my loneliness, all my heartbreak and indecision, but most of all my love for him.

And he met me every inch of the way, settling his hands on my hips and making a slight purring in the back of his throat. I wound my fingers through his hair and before I could think twice of it ground my hips into his.

He went just a bit crazy at that, rolling over and over until he was lying on top of me and moved his hands to slide underneath my shirt.

"Oh!" I gasped as his icy hands touched my heated skin.

And just like that it was over. He was gone, standing across the room, panting, staring at me with wide eyes.

"I'm so sorry Bella, I really shouldn't have done that." He said hurriedly.

"No no. It was both of our faults." I muttered.

"I, um, better get downstairs and you should too. Alice wants to talk to you." He said.

"Oh…okay" I replied, lifting my head up just enough to watch him make a hasty escape out the room.

Once the door closed I dropped my head and grabbed a pillow, covered my face and gave a frustrated scream.


End file.
